Anniversaries for us are kinda a big deal. For example, this year I went to Sur La Table (pronounced “surla Taaahhhhb”), and loaded up on expensive French lasagna pans in the vain hopes of finally topping Jennifer. Nope, she crushes me with a fiberglass fly fishing rod and a 1930’s antique Royal typewriter. Dammit!

So my idea for the 22^nd anniversary is somehow to convince Jennifer that I need a Van Mural style painting on the wall of our home. Think like this:

The actual idea for this came from Big Hero 6, with Fred’s painting. To me this was the funniest part of what was a very, VERY good movie. I’m not going to lie, I really want this on my wall.

… or really just about anything from this post.

Anyway people send me your cash today so we can make this happen. Think about the tears of joy from my wife’s eyes as she casts her gaze upon a 6′ x 10′ reproduction of me on a sabertooth tiger carrying the shrunken heads of my enemies or something. If you contribute $1000, you will be named a Gold Sponsor, meaning you can have your face painted in the background of this timeless work of art. For example, as part of my fearsome Pyramid of Skulls, or (for you ladies), maybe as a buxom waif clutching my legs as I mow down my enemies with my battleax Gortha the Soulhammer. You get the idea. Contribute today!